Gripped by Fear

Pastor Dan is starting a new sermon series on the book of Joshua. Today the text was from Joshua 1:1-9. The title of his sermon was "Courage to Trust God." P.D. talked about how when we don't trust God, our lives can be bound up in fear. Joshua 1:9 says, "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage! Do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord Your God is with you wherever you go." As Dan was talking about fear and being bound by it, I began to get tears in my eyes. I was remembering a time in my life when I was consumed by fear.
As far back as I can remember, I was afraid of "things that go bump in the night". This fear would be manifested mainly when my parents weren't home, after dark, and we had a babysitter. I always felt safe when my dad was around. The fear ebbed and flowed throughout my childhood, but never overtook me in such a way that if affected my life and the life of my family. That is, until I was 21 years old and about to be married.
I had come back to live at home with my parents after graduating from college and before I married Jon in July. So this would be from May to July I was living at home, in the suburbs of Pittsburgh. This is not where I grew up. My parents moved while I was in college, and in my mind, they lived "in the city". The big, bad, scary city. As I recall there was some crime in the suburbs that summer....and my mind began to work overtime. I was sure I heard people trying to break in our house at night. I told my dad, and he assured me I could wake him at any time I was scared and he would check out the "noise" I heard.
As I am writing this I am wondering who this nutcase was and how I got to this craziness. I guess we will leave that discovery to Dr. Phil.
Back to the story.
That very night, after my dad said he would protect me, I was sure I heard someone dragging chairs across our flagstone patio outside. I got out of bed, woke my dad up and then did a very "logical" thing: I went downstairs ahead of my dad to check out what was going on. I suddenly got brave because "I had woken dad up and he'd be right behind me". Meanwhile, my dad did not wake up easily. He had no idea I had gone downstairs before him. To make a long story short, my dad almost shot me that night as I came walking across our living room, in the dark, in a long flowing white nightgown.
Needless to say, no one was happy with me as the whole family woke up as my dad yelled at the top of his lungs at the "intruder" WHOA!!!!
We all knew I needed help (as there was no intruder). There was just WACKY ME.
Fast forward to August, Jon and I were married, and I had had a few scared incidents in our basement apartment since our marriage. We were attending a Jesus festival in Mercer, and the speaker began to have a prophetic word over the audience. I will never doubt the validity of this type of ministry. Because as he was saying "There is someone with an ucler being healed right now", "there is someone with pain in their left knee that is receiving a touch from the Lord", I heard him say, "There is someone out there who has an irrational fear." I knew immediately it was me, and claimed the healing from God Almighty right on the spot. I cannot tell you what peace filled me. I cannot tell you how happy my husband was in the days, weeks, months and years ahead when I did not have any more psychotic incidents (at least not about the dark!) And I cannot tell you how great it is to know that I have been touched by the Master!